Tag: mid life transition

Am I The Only One That Feels Overwhelmed or Out of Balance?

FullSizeRenderWe go through life in stages, it simply does not remain the same through the years. We experience transitions in relationships, children, work, and physical changes.

Can we just put the brakes on? No, but it might feel good for a short while. So, our thoughts through these twists and turns commonly are:

  • What’s next in my life?
  • My energy is drained, each and every day!
  • How do I move to the next chapter?
  • What more can I possibly do?
  • I feel overwhelmed, out of balance!
  • Something seems missing.
  • Am I on the right path?
  • Where is God in this?
  • I see no connection with my future.

The number one thing that helps in these situations is to realize you are not alone. You may feel singled out, but you never are.

Try breaking your situation down into small manageable pieces, and give yourself permission to think about your own welfare. Women are natural care givers, the care giver must be mindful of her own mental and physical needs!

  • What’s next in life? (What do you want to do? What excites you the most? What gives you the most energy?)
  • My energy is drained, each and every day! (What drains your energy the most? How can you turn that around?)
  • I see no connection with my future. (What goals do you have? Which direction do you want to go? What small steps can you take to begin – or continue – your walk towards your future?)
  • Where is God in this? (Pray, even if you feel God is not there — these are the times for patience as he never stops molding the plans that he has for you. Meditate on scripture. Apply scripture to your life.)

A friend that listens, one that looks after your own welfare, is also key to surviving transitions in life. Seek out groups or activities where you can meet other women that are in comparable life cycles, or possibly mentors that you can follow or consult with that have been in similar shoes as yours. If your circle of friends do not meet your needs, branch out. Find that harmony.

Start a new interest — something that builds your inner-strength, like a class or physical exercise. This boosts your mental and physical well-being, and both work in unison.

I hope you found this article helpful.

I look forward to your comments, and if you need a listener, I would love to hear from you.

Is it a transition, or is it a crisis? (7 Steps to Avoid a Crisis)

All of us experience transition in our lives. How we manage these shifts, and how we perceive them, prevents crisis.

When we are in a transition, we are:

  • in a passage
  • experiencing development
  • experiencing transformation or realignment
  • at a turning point

When transition takes on a sense of urgency and feels like big trouble, or a mess, it becomes a crisis.

There are several ways to avoid major stress as we enter crucial points in life:

1.  Develop a healthy mindset – expect that life will change. When we believe that life should forever remain the same as it is today, we are living in a bubble that will burst. When the big pop happens, major disappointment follows.

2.  Acknowledge each change. When we foresee the turning points, each choice we make helps to build a strong bridge that carries us over transitions.

3. Take time for yourself. Women tend to take care of everyone but themselves. They manage their home, their career, their family, and they often put themselves last on the priority list. It is okay to be a caretaker, however, the most efficient women take time to ensure their personal needs are met. This means that their health (physical and mental well-being) are nourished — otherwise, the crisis becomes larger due to a lack of energy and frustration. How can you take care of others if you aren’t taking proper care of yourself?

4. Be honest with yourself. What are your needs? What are your capabilities? What do you want to do in life? What  makes you feel energetic?

5. Make a plan. You may feel like you have no time to strategize, but when life gets busy, and it always does, the passage from a small and troublesome change grows to a monster-sized crisis in a snap!

6. Find and embrace quiet time. Quiet time = thinking time. Keep a journal to record your daily struggles, joys, and thoughts. Writing is very therapeutic — it helps to sort out your own ruminations, and leads to answers. Meditate and pray. Again, because women are natural caretakers, they tend to not seek out help. If you are a believer, pray for your needs. Take care of you!

7. Find a listening friend. A friend that listens because they want the best for you is priceless. We are living in a very busy world, which leaves people focused entirely on their own daily lives and deadlines. Get off of the merry-go-round and find someone who will listen.

Please, feel free to reach out to me if you need help with this!